Write Things

Why not just gag me too?

2006-07-23T21:59:00.000+05:30

The largest democracy in the world? Nah...you can't be serious!
Blocking access to our blogs is not just insane, but also illegal. Its oppressive even. We don't have to catch up with China in everything you know. The next time India is attacked by terrorists*, I know exactly what will happen. All TV channels, radio channels will be blocked, Newspapers will beforced to not print anything about the incident. And then, the state will ask google to censor searches about the attack. Wow! Sounds familiar.

*yup..... I'm sure that we will be attacked again.

These bad metaphors rock!!

2006-07-08T11:36:00.000+05:30

Check this out. Hilarious.

Ployp!

2006-06-06T22:20:00.000+05:30

Ployp!
Am I asleep? I must be - its too dark and cosy for me to be awake!
Ployp!
What the damn hell is that noise? Am I dreaming?
Ployp!
I really must be dreaming.
Ployp!
It feels as if someone is repeatedly stabbing my eardrum with a ball pen. It really doesn't hurt much, but its near the most damn irritating thing ever.
Ployp!
What the hell is it? Control is once again being transfered to my concious mind. Believe me, the process is slow.
What could this sound be? Am I imagining it? Or dreaming it?
Ployp!
Its the tap! The goddamn water faucet! Someone forgot to turn it tight enough. And now its not letting me sleep. What am I going to do? Wait! My mom will turn it off. She always knows what to do.
Ployp!
Come on mom. I don't want to get up. Its soooo comfy!
Ployp!
MOM!!
Ployp!
Aai please! Pleeeease!
Ployp!
Shit. Didn't my parents go to Kashmir for a vacation two days back? Yes. They. Did.
Ployp!
The only other person in the house is my grandmom. Fortunately for her and unfortunately for me, she doesn't wear her hearing aid to sleep.
Ployp!
WAKE UP NOW!!

Yes! I wake up, go to the bathroom and turn off the tap. Phew. Now for some sleep.
And yes. My subconcious is a funny guy. And he's not on my side eithe. For the remainder of the night, i dream, about leaking faucets.

What a deal

2006-06-06T02:01:00.000+05:30

What an unbelievable comment I got for my last post. Its too good. And it has me salivating, just thinking about the time i would save. Here it is.

Get any Desired College Degree, In less then 2 weeks.

Call this number now 24 hours a day 7 days a week (413) 208-3069

Get these Degrees NOW!!!

"BA", "BSc", "MA", "MSc", "MBA", "PHD",

Get everything within 2 weeks.
100% verifiable, this is a real deal

Act now you owe it to your future.

(413) 208-3069 call now 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

Act now - you owe it to your future. Ya rite!!

No numbers!

2006-04-29T14:42:00.000+05:30

Apparently, the Piraha tribe in Brazil do not have any concept of numbers or counting at all! Imagine that - a world without numbers. This is really interesting. It proves something I always believed - words are not mere ways to describe your thoughts. If it weren't for the words, the thought probably wouldn't have been there. Here's the link.

Not being in control and its after effects

2006-04-28T23:25:00.000+05:30

I'm pretty sure that everyone has been in this situation - something has to be done, but you just cant get yourself to do it. And this something, most often turns out to be something pressing. All you can do, is watch time go by as you don't do something, which you'd be better off doing. Apologies for that confusing paragraph.
At least I hope everyone has been in this situation, or else i'm in a pretty sad minority! So this is how it goes. I have my Computer Graphics practicals scheduled for the 28th i.e. today. My last vivas were on the 25th. So i decided that after my last vivas, i'll do some timepass and start studying by evening. I get some friends over to my house after the vivas, go out for sweets, basically having a great time. All this while, i'm pretty sure i'll be hitting the books(compilers too) pretty soon. But then, the unthinkable happens! I lose control of my life!
Its like being a helpless spectator - like witnessing a crime happening and being unable to do anthing about it. You know that something's going wrong, you know what the right thing is, yet you are unable to do anything about it. So basically, I am unable to get myself to study at all. I just can't. I couldn't even get myself to try to study. Don't get me wrong, i'm not weak or anything. I'm just running on autopilot and going in the wrong direction!
So as it ends up, I start studying only yesterday. (All thanks to Rad for all the help. Its all because of her that I finally got down to study). What results is a very low level of confidence and preparedness. You may think that i'm making much ado about nothing, but I found the situation very sad indeed.
So, how was the exam. Guess. I got lucky! I got a pattern which was not in the 'expected patterns' list. Others had tried out these expected question, I hadn't. So in some weird manner, I got lucky. Then of course, my superior mental faculty got me through the exam smoothly. My best practical yet! Its good being me.

karkaremtg - Best Selling Author

2006-04-24T00:53:00.000+05:30

I have always wanted to be a best selling sci-fi author. No, I mean it. I really always wanted to be one. And i thought of a few ideas for my first book.

Humans evolving: A few humans begin to evolve and develop new abilities. They are shunned by the normal, non evolved humans(who form the vast majority). Touted as mutants, they are looked upon with distrust and fear. Some of them decide to get back at humanity and others decide they must put their 'powers' to good use.
Human power sources: The earth is taken over by machines. Humans are entrapped only to harvest energy from their bodies. They remain in suspended animation and are mentally present in a 'mayajaal' (since its going to be an english book I think I should substitute it with an english word. Maybe 'Vector'). This is infact a computer generated virtual reality. And, ya, only one man can save humanity. This is a really new concept. I may have to write three books or so to cover it.
Exterminator: A machine comes back from the future in order to kill the man who will be responsible for thwarting the machine revolution in the future. Having failed once, the machine comes back again, this time to save that same man from another machine. And again. Since this machine comes back to kill(exterminate) someone, i'll call it the exterminator.
Stellar Battles: This story unfolds millions of years in the future in a place not so far from here. A band of revolutionaries fight against the omnipresent 'kingdom'. Do they succeed. Well yes, but with the help of girlie man with a trident made of sound and a giant dog.
Someone is found: Autistic child man is granted special powers by a 'magic'al alien. He beats the baddies to pulp and turns non-autistic. Passes on powers to son who chooses to become a superhero. Two book material for sure.

Thats what I call creativity! I'll get these out one book at a time. Just hope nobody els is thinking the way i am!

As Luck Would Have It

2006-04-22T17:04:00.000+05:30

I have always believed that i am a lucky guy. Luck never seems to run out on me. Don't get me wrong. I'm not implying that everything that happens to me is because of luck. Its just that... well... I have it better than others.
On the 21st of April, which happens to be my birthday, was my Viva for Systems Programming. SP is something i'm not so good at. In fact, when it comes to SP, I suck! And so, i'm greiving that my birthday is going to be ruined by bad vivas. Add to this, the fact that the internal examiner who was to conduct this viva is really strict.
When I reach college, i'm a bundle of nerves. The vivas are supposed to start at 10. But neither the external nor the internal teachers show up at ten. We all think that the reason for this is because there is a bus strike today. Ok, so maybe they'll be here in half an hour. But no! They just don't show up. Finally, at 12:15 the external examiner shows up - and starts taking the orals without the internal examiner(the strict/scary one).
All this time, i was cribbing that i'll be in the second group to go in. These teachers spend the maximum time with the first few groups really grilling tham and then go easy on the other groups. Now, i'm thanking the stars for the very same reason. Since i'm in the second group, my vivas are over before the other teacher arrives. Even during the exam, i'm given all the easy questions. That coupled with my ability to excrete from my mouth makes it smooth sailing. The whole thing actually goes pretty well. Hah!
Today, that is the 22nd of April is the day i had my Web Technology vivas. Now that is a subject I like. However, it was my birthday yesterday and no other preparatory holiday for WT. So, once again, when i reach college, i'm a bundle of nerves. If the seating arrangement in the lab is the same as it was yesterday, i'll be in front of the external examiner. This time, she is the one to be afraid off. But, as luck would have it, the seating has been reversed. Muhuhuhuhua. I got away with a decent viva today as well.
Three more vivas to go. I hope the luck remains!

A Pink Bunny

2006-04-20T14:02:00.000+05:30

Some guy named Pink Bunny left a comment for one of my earlier entries. He said he could give me free Porn. All I had to do was send him a message saying 'I want some pics now' on his AIM. Hah. I dont want our free porn and don't span my blog again. DIE PINK BUNNY!!

The exams are here!!

2006-04-09T07:29:00.000+05:30

Its exam time again! This means that its time for some therapy in the way of blogging. The last time i blogged was way back in 2005. So im back an checking out writely.

King Kong Rules

2005-12-19T17:39:00.000+05:30

King Kong is one of the best films I have seen - EVER! I mean, ok, the end is tragic, but maybe that really made the film what it was. The director, Peter Jackson first makes you wait in terrified anticipation for the beast, then be horrified by it, root for it in the totally stupendous fight scenes, and then finally pity it. All that in a span of just 3 hours! Beat that Sam Raimi.
I have never been a monster movie fan. I don't think I have seen Godzilla completely even when it was shown on TV. I just happen to know about Mighty Joe Young because of the stupid title. But you have to hand it to these Peter Jackson. He made a fan outta me.

The Japanese have always been rabid fans of monster movies. That probably explains why there have been 28 (no you read it properly, twenty eight) Godzilla films made in Japan till date. Starting from the 1954 original, there has been a film more than once in two years! According to me, thats crazy. How many times can you watch a man in a rubber costume destroy Tokyo? Well, it seems not many times. So the film makers decided 'lets have more than one man in a rubber costume destroy Tokyo'. And so almost every film after the first one had Godzilla battling other monsters in (where else) Tokyo. All along, denizens of Japan ran helter skelter screaming 'Gojira! Gojira!'. (The say 'Gojira' because the don't have an 'el' sound in there language. Thanks for that one abstractwhiz).

Anyway, so back to King Kong. He battles 4 T-Rex's single handedly (literally single handedly because he is clutching Naomi Watts in the other hand/paw). He climbs up the empire state building, destroys three airplanes, fights of bats the size of a car and enthralls you with his....Acting. Kong is played by Andy Serkis(who also played Gollum in LOTR). Though he is not wearing a rubber suit, he wears a digital one. Andy's movements are captured and shown as Kong's. It seems Andy went to Africa in order to study the movements of wild gorilla's. (Man! To have his job....). This guy also plays lumpy the cook in the film. This is the double role in which the two characters look least similar!!

Everyone should really really watch this movie. Its more than totally Paisa Vasool. I would have paid the admission price just top see the awesome fight scenes. And believe me, the movie in its entirety is better than the fight scenes. So this one is really worth a watch.

Found in Cyberspace

2005-12-13T11:36:00.000+05:30

In the late 1990's Star TV was kind enough to telecast a series called 'Lost in Space'. This is till today one of my favorite shows on TV. Its about a family - The Robinsons who are headed for a planet in the Alpha Centauri(!) system. After a failed sabotage attempt by the eveer scheming Dr. Zachary Smith, their ship -The Jupiter 2 veers of course. They are now 'lost in space'.
Though it was basically a science fiction oriented show, it was hilarious too. There were two reasons for this:
1. This one was unintentional: the original series was made in 1965 while it was shown here in 1997. According to the story, the Jupiter 2 would be launched in (hold your breath) 1998. Yes, the Jupiter 2 - manned spaceship capable of faster than light travel, equipped with a humanoid robot with artificial intelligence, suspended animation for the crew and the like - would be launched in 1998!!
2. The other reason was, of course the aforementioned Dr. Smith. He was amazing. Sort of like Tantri the Mantri (from Tinkle comics) in space. All his plots failed but he kept on trying nonetheless. He was also known for his smithisms - the insults he gave away very graciously.

These insults are what i have found in cyberspace. Check them out here. They are too cool.

I saw a movie yesterday called Evil Dead 2 on Star Movies. What a cool movie. Its basically a slasher directed by Sam Raimi (director of the Spiderman movies). Its relentless in its display of blood, gore, severed body parts - works. And this unshamed all-outness of the movie is why it really works. Plus a really nice ending (which, by the way inspired a sequel!).
What made this movie experience even better is that I gound a lot of stuff about it on the net. Especially great was the fan fiction. And all this together made it an amazing movie experience.

Talk about Coincidence!

2005-12-03T23:34:00.000+05:30

After I wrote the earlier entry, see what I found. It has begun... ?

My thoughts on India: Part 1

2005-12-03T22:44:00.000+05:30

I recently read Chetan Bhagat's second book. This one is called One Night at the Call Centre. I had read his first offering. That one was called 5 Point Someone. The title is an allusion to the IIT' method of ranking students in the form of a Cumulative Point Index(CPI).

5 Point... was a really nice book. Very funny, and really un-put-downable. But it did not address any issues as such. With the possible exception of, well, 'what not to do at IIT' as its cover page declared. That was fine since it was meant to be a novel.

His new book, however, talks about a bunch of people working in a call centre. I won't delve into the story - its great and you should read it for yourself. But I'll talk about one of the things this book addresses. One of the characters, Vroom, hates the fact that he has to answer calls about repairing microwaves, ACs and the like all night. And all these calls are from some guy halfway across the globe. He believes that him working in a BPO isn't doing his country any good at all. This is also a somewhat recurring thought in the book.
Now, the writer got his share of brickbats for badmouthing what is, without doubt the current blue eyed boy of the Indian Industry right now - the Service Sector. But it got me thinking - is the service sector really going to help us get what we really want - a first world status? Which leads us to the question, what is it exactly that a first world country has that we need to get.
1. Good Infrastructure as against Bad infrastructure(I know, *doh!*)
2. Products as against Services

And I know one thing for sure. There is only one section of our society that can help our country get both of these. Technically Educated Youth*.

I will be delving into this issue in the days to come. I have quite a bit to say about this. Any suggestions are more than welcome.

*Technically Educated Youth: Technically does not mean people from professional colleges alone; Educated does not mean formally educated; youth means anyone (cliche alert) young at heart!

Also please read this article by Chidanand Rajghatta. He is a columnist in the Times of India. His Column, Indiaspora can be found on the edit page every Sunday.

More what they say ---- what they mean

2005-12-03T14:41:00.000+05:30

Diploma student saying anything ---- Paper may have been good, bad, ok anthing. The real problem is that i'm a bit disoriented 'coz I haven't completed an assignment way ahead of schedule for a very long time now!

Answering Hrishikesh's query. I fit squarely into the following type

Anyone saying 'accha tha', 'sahi tha', 'good paper' ---- paper was much much better than expected but ill play down the excitement till the results come out and I get 75+ then go about telling people 'i don't know how this happened' and hope they think i'm really humble and cool. And intelligently sexy.

And it really works!

Two papers down and so am I!

2005-12-01T10:09:00.000+05:30

Digital Communication and Computer Networks. Two papers with the biggest syllabi we have had to face yet. And that too in a span of three days!
It is said that 'Hardship is a time of discoveries'. There were some interesting ones in the past few days:
1. I laugh or at least smile when tense. Mind you, this is very different from what is suggested by expressions such as 'Laughing in the face of danger' and the like.
2. What Engineering students say after papers and what they really mean.

Muggu* saying 'OK paper' ---- I studied like crazy and basically made my life a living hell in order to score more than 80 but goddamit I think Ill get around 75
Scholarly type sayng 'OK paper' ---- I hadn't studied much coz' I was reading things which really matter. But my abnormally large IQ and vast storehouse of knowledge will easily get me a first class, hell maybe even a distinction. Anyway it doesn't matter coz' when it comes to engineers, I'm the real McCoy! (In the original Star Trek, when it came to doctors, they had the reall McCoy. *wink*)
Girl saying 'Bad paper' ---- Bad Paper
Girl saying 'Bad paper' whilst giggling and trying to look cute ---- Great paper. I'm only lying coz' it makes my hair look good. It does, doesn't it?
Anyone saying '*whimper*' before strarting to cry ---- What paper? oh there are six months more for that one. (*wink*)
Anyone saying 'accha tha', 'sahi tha', 'good paper' ---- paper was much much better than expected but ill play down the excitement till the results come out and I get 75+ then go about telling people 'i don't know how this happened' and hope they think i'm really humble and cool. And intelligently sexy.
Anyone saying 'Amazing Paper' ---- (this guy is probably new to Mumbai University Engineering) This paper was just like the 12th standard one. COOL. (hint to newbie: wait for your results before declaring 'Amazing Paper').

*Muggu: Term originated in IIT during my fathers time there. Means someone with the IQ of a flea, which has dyslexia and is dead. However, this someone has more relaible memory than your new state of the art HDD.

2005-11-25T00:12:00.000+05:30

HELI ATTACK 3
This one is a very addictive game from the people at miniclip. Very addictive so be careful. It's been screwing up my study schedules off late. Shoot down all the helicopters and some weird tank like things. Some amazing guns. Have fun.

THE DEATH PSYCHIC
The death psychic tells just exactly how you are going to kick the bucket! All you have to do is give your name, age and sex!

A day gone by - a night waiting to begin

2005-11-22T22:30:00.001+05:30

Its over. Already?
The day has gone by with nothing being accomplished. How am i going to manage in these exams? That aside, I downloaded an interesting software. It helps you create mind-maps on your computer. For the uninitiated, mind mapping is a technique of note taking, organising information, improving memory etc. Now that i have it though, I don't have time to use it.
Read about a real shocker in the newspaper. It seems a student of IIT-Bombay(one of India's premier engineering colleges) commited suicide the other day. Reason: He was failed by his teachers in three subjects. Reason: Poor attendance in classes. Reason: He was a physics major, but what he was really interested in was computers. In fact he was a networking genius. He was credited to having made a search engine for IITB's intranet. This 'preoccupation' resulted in poor performance in his course work, poor attendance. Result: He did not make the required grade. So Mr.Genius decides its time to hang himself from the ceiling!
It made me think. In an alternate reality, if this guy braves the situation and actually lives through college, then maybe he applies his genius and changes the world! Maybe even for the better.
Another interesting thought. Many students from India would die for an opportunity to get into an IIT. And this dude...

Life, The Exams, and Nothing Else!

2005-11-22T13:28:00.000+05:30

This Sucks.
Exams begin on the 28th i.e. next Monday. Apart from the fact that we are expected to mug a whole lot of subjects we are not interested in, we also have to face these exams. Darn it all. What will they have us do next?
Anyway, there is not much going on in life currently. Apart from the studying and stuff. CAT happened this Sunday. Which means I have less than 1 year to prepare. Scary Stuff. They changed the pattern again. It was now some 90 questions. Divided into three sections, each having an A and B subsection.
Subsection A: 10 Questions of 1 mark each
Subsection B: 20 Questions of 2 marks each
This was drastically different from the earlier year's pattern of 123(where did they come up with that??) questions.Oh did I mention the negative marking? 1/3rd of the marks for the question would be deducted for wrong answers!
I've been fiddling with a lot of time management stuff(God knows I'll be needing a lot of that next semester. What with Euphoria and Crescendo around the corner.). The technical term for these tools is 'Personal Information Managers'. Deep. Anyway Mozilla Sunbird is by far the best PIM I've seen. Its rating was boosted quite a lot by the fact that I'm a cheapo and its free!
If anyone actually reads my Blog and has any tips on how to manage all these exams and extracurricular activities, please feel free to tell me. You will be rewarded with Mihir Currency. When I am the dictator of my private island nation, you can actually use this currency! What more could you possibly want?

2005-06-28T00:41:00.000+05:30

Mihir